Yes, the news is out…..you are getting a divorce. It’s not like you were dreaming for this day to come. Divorce is a very common life transition that women go through. It means that you don’t have the relationship with your spouse the way it was suppose to be since the day you met or the day you get married. There are too many issues come at your way while go through this crappy process. Issues like finances, legal fees, child custody, dealing with assets, friends/family who don’t understand or against divorce, the thought of being single again, I guess the list can go on depending your situation. 

So how are you handling this situation? What are some of the things are you doing to cope with this issue. I knew a two co workers of mine who were going through divorce and they told me the financial stress they are going through since the divorce proceedings. One of them had to take a part time side job while the other one did not come up with a clear plan. I will say that the support network between the two co workers are different. Having proper support will make it easier to cope. 

Besides seeking support from a trusted family member or friend, seeking individual counseling is a great coping skill. The feedback that you receive from your therapist is unbiased because he/she does not the people in your personal life and will listen to your feelings carefully. Some therapists are specialized to help you cope with traumatic events that occurred in your marriage like domestic violence, infidelity, or abandonment. I have worked with clients who have experience domestic violence and how the trauma affect their views on relationships entirely. Support groups are a helpful in addition to counseling. Support groups allows members to validate each other’s feelings and learn from one another. Support group for divorcees can reduce isolation, depression, anxiety but increase motivation and self esteem.

I provide counseling to women who are going through this stressful time. While each divorce case is different, it’s unclear what the outcome will be. However, maintaining sanity and practice good coping techniques is something that you HAVE control of.